It Is All Your Fault
by RomaMarufixx
Summary: Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.
1. It Is All Your Fault

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **3,795

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

"Father! Father!" Alyssa squealed as she ran down onto the training fields, she was very hyperactive for a six year old, she had always been hyperactive since she could walk and Arthur and Merlin doubt she would ever change.

"Alyssa, stop." Arthur said and she did so immediately. Arthur turned to his knights and dismissed them before turning around to his daughter, who ran into his arms and he swung her around and planted kisses on her face and hair.

"Hello beautiful."

"Hey daddy."

"How are you and your sisters?" he asked.

"We're fine, mummy's been teaching us magic!" the little girl said excitedly.

"Really?"

"Yeah, look!" Alyssa turned to the side and her eyes flashed gold and a couple of small daises grew through the grass. Alyssa squirmed out of her fathers hold and picked a few up and handed then to her father.

"Thank you baby." Alyssa grinned widely and then waved at someone behind him and he turned around the see his wife and his two other daughters standing a few feet away from the training fields.

"Come on, lets go see your mummy and your sisters."

Alyssa nodded and the two walked over to the three girls. Alyssa ran to her sisters telling them about the daises she had grown and given to their father, whilst Arthur hugged and kissed his wife, who was very newly pregnant, just turned three months as Gaius had confirmed.

The two were very happy and were hoping for a son, since they had three daughters and Arthur needed a son to take the throne after he died. Merlin only had another 10 or 15 years of child bearing left and if she could not give him a son in that time then he would have to try for a son with another woman, and that idea broke Merlin's heart and she hoped things wouldn't have to come to that.

"How are you and the baby?"

"We're both fine, Gaius said the baby is healthy and that so am I, although I need to sleep a little bit more."

"Well, if Gaius says it you must do it." Merlin rolled her eyes but didn't argue with her husband as she knew this could go on forever.

* * *

_1 month later _

* * *

Arthur had been so busy recently, with problems happening with his people, trying to juggle time with his daughters and his wife and checking up with Gaius and Merlin herself to see how the baby was doing and was hoping for any sign that the baby was a boy.

"Sire?" one of the members of his court said.

"Yes?"

"It is time, sire." Arthur became slightly confused before remembering.

"Of course, where?"

"A small cabin, a few miles away, we should get there in a matter of hours."

"Of course, let's go."

Arthur and a few of his knights arrived in a cabin that was full of maids and a physician and a woman in a bed in the middle of the room, the woman who was currently in labour. The woman...who was Arthur's pregnant mistress, Anne.

"Anne..." he said, crouching beside her and holding her warm hand in his cold ones. "How are you."

"It's hurts, my king, it hurts."

"It will be over soon enough." The king reassured her and then turned to the physician. "How is she doing, is the baby almost here?"

"A few more pushes and the baby will be born."

"Come on Anne, push, push and we will soon have a child." he comforted the woman who nodded and then pushed.

"One more push Anne." the physician said and Anne pushed hard one last time and then a babies cries hit the air and the physician cleaned the baby quickly and handed it over to the king.

"You have a son." the physician congratulated and Arthur smiled, at last he had a son, although the son was not by his wife, he finally had a son. He handed the boy over to his mother.

"As we discussed beforehand, we must have a story for why you were away for so long and who's child is this, you married a knight from another kingdom and became pregnant a short while afterwards, and then your husband was sent off to fight in a war in which he died in, leaving you a widow with his child." Anne nodded. "You must tell no one how the real father of this child is, I can not risk my wife knowing about this." Anne nodded again and her and the King shared a kiss and she handed the baby back to the King before he had to ride off back to Camelot, his wife and his three daughters.

"Make sure there is a chambers set up for Anne and our child, Camelot always welcomes those in need." he said and turned back to Anne as some maids left the cabin to ready chambers in Camelot. "What name shall we give to our son?"

"You are the King, you should be the one to name him." Anne smiled at Arthur.

"Edward." he said simply and Anne smiled.

"I love that name, Edward." Anne smiled at her tiny son.

"I have to leave now and return to Camelot, I hope to see you and Edward there soon." He smiled at the two and kissed Anne before leaving and riding off back to Camelot.

* * *

A few days later had Anne and Edward moved into a guest chambers in the castle. Merlin and Arthur were walking down a corridor as Merlin caught sight of Lady Anne with her newborn.

"Who is she?" Merlin asked her husband, whilst pointing into the room and Arthur panicked slightly.

"She is Lady Anne, her husband died in war and just last week she gave birth their child and I offered her a room in the palace as she gets herself back on her feet and to raise her child with the help of some maids I offered her."

"Oh, Arthur you are so sweet." She said and hooked her arm around Arthur's and he smiled, inside he was screaming at himself about how much of a bastard he was.

* * *

The next day Merlin went and visited the young woman and her newborn baby.

"Hello." Merlin greeted as she walked into the chambers.

"Good morning, my queen." Lady Anne bowed to Merlin, as much as she could with the tiny infant in her arms.

"How are you and your child?" The Queen asked.

"We are fine thank you and how are you and your unborn child?" Anne asked, pointing at Merlin's small bump.

"I am fine and the baby is starting to make them self known." she smiled and look at Anne's small child. "He is a beautiful baby, what did you call him?" Merlin asked.

"Edward." Anne replied.

"That's lovely name, and one of Arthur's favourites." Anne nodded and bit her tongue. "Well I better be leaving, I promised my daughters I would take them out to the forests to pick flowers." Merlin said and turned around to walk out of the room but someone gripped tightly onto her arm and Merlin turned back around, staring wide eyed at Lady Anne.

"Anne?"

"You know he will tire of you."

"What are you talking about?" Merlin said outraged.

"The King, he will tire of you." Anne repeated herself.

"I think you forget, I am the Queen and what you are saying, I could have you thrown into the dungeons, new mother or not." She said, her voice shaking with anger.

"If you don't give him a son, I can guarantee your marriage will fall down the drain, in fact it is on its way."

"I could be carrying his son right now, and even if I have another daughter, Arthur will still love me and our marriage will not go down the drain, it has not in the ten years we have been together."

"Well, I can tell you over at least the last year, it has."

"And how do you know that?" Merlin asked, almost sarcastically.

"Because he took up another lover to give him another child, the son he wanted, and he got the son."

"What are you talking about? Arthur does not have a mistress nor does he have a son, I should know, I am his wife."

"His wife, not who he loves."

"He does love me."

"Or so you think." Anne said and was rewarded with a slap around her face, a small amount of blood dripping from her nose from the force of the slap.

"You will leave my family alone, or I will make sure that you are thrown out of Camelot along with your son."

"The King would not allow that."

"And why do you think that?"

"Because I am the mother of his son, and Edward is his son." Merlin stared at Anne before staring at Edward who was in his cot, staring up at the two of them, his little blue eyes twinkling, Merlin looked up at Anne and noticed her eyes were brown and she had seen that shade of blue before, they were the same colour as his eyes. Merlin struck Anne once more, knocking her to the ground before storming back to her own chambers.

* * *

It was late at night and Merlin had changed into the nightdress and was lying in her bed waiting for Arthur to return to their chambers, she was stressed and in pain, the pain that her husband had spent the past year maybe two with another lover, of whom had become pregnant and had given him what Merlin couldn't give him, a son.

She didn't realise she was crying until she started to sob and then she started having stomach aches, at first she thought it was just the baby moving early, but then she felt something run down her legs, and she was only four months pregnant, so she couldn't be going into labour.

She threw the blankets off her and knelt on the bed to see a huge blood spot at the bottom of her white silk dress, blood running down her thighs and onto the white bed sheets below her.

"No, no, no." she chanted as she held her hands over the blood patch. "No, please." she sobbed, tear stains forming in the bed sheets as well as blood stains. "Please, please, don't let this be happening..." she sobbed some more as the blood continuing to trickle down her legs.

"Gwen!" Merlin screamed out, she didn't want Arthur to see her like this and she certainly didn't want him to know that she was having a miscarriage as their relationship would go down the drain quicker than it was going to. "Guinevere." she shouted louder and her maidservant and best friend ran into the room and clapped a hand over her mouth as she saw Merlin, covered in blood from the waist down and on her hands and she was sobbing violently.

"Oh Merlin." Gwen sobbed and made her way to the bed and sat by Merlin's side, her skirt slightly in the blood but no caring about that only wanting to comfort her friend, letting her sob into the crook between her head and shoulder, whilst her hands remained by the blood spot, not wanting to come to terms with the loss of her child.

"Guards!" Gwen called out as Merlin continued to sob into her neck. A few seconds later two guards who normally stand by Merlin and Arthur's chambers came in and for a second stared at the sight before them, it was very obvious that their Queen was in the progress of having miscarriage and her maidservant was comforting her.

"Get Gaius the royal physician and do not tell anyone, especially King Arthur, about what is going on here." The guards nodded and quickly made their way out of the chambers to collect Gaius.

"Merlin?" There was no answer, only more sobbing. "Merlin, why did this happen? Gaius said, only last week, that the baby was healthy."

"The baby was healthy." Merlin said through her sobbing.

"Then what happened?" Gwen asked her friends.

"Arthur is a massive bastard." she sobbed.

"What did he do?" Gwen asked, angry at the man without even knowing what he had done, but if it was enough to give Merlin a miscarriage it must be very serious.

"He's been having an affair for a year, maybe two." Gwen's eyes widened, that was not something that she could have thought of, how could Arthur do that to Merlin, Merlin has always been faithful and loyal to Arthur and would do nothing to hurt him.

"Why would he do that to you?"

"I can't give him a son, so he went to someone else who could give him a son, and they have."

"Arthur has a son?"

"Yes." Merlin chocked out.

"By another woman?" Merlin nodded.

"Yes, his mistress Lady Anne."

"Lady Anne? The woman who had a baby recently, just after her husband died?" Gwen asked in confusion.

"It was all a set up, to prevent people from finding out the truth." Merlin sobbed. "Lady Anne told me herself, and at first I thought she was just being spiteful but I looked closer at the child and you could just see Arthur in him, especially his eyes, his name is Edward and he is the perfect son for Arthur!" Merlin said and she couldn't continue as sobs rattled her body again, making her unable to speak.

A knock at the door to the chambers caught both of their attentions and Gwen called out for the person to come in, which was Gaius. His expression changed to curiosity to horror as he caught sight of the bloody queen kneeling on the bed, her head resting against Guinevere.

"Merlin..." he said sympathetically and made his way over to the bed. "You..."

"I know what has happened Gaius, I've lost my child..." she said before dissolving into sobs again and Gaius turned to Gwen, but spoke to both of them.

"When I last checked, you and your baby were perfectly healthy, have you been under any stress lately?" Gaius asked.

"Yes, she has, terrible stress and betrayal." Gwen answered for Merlin.

"And what is that, if you do not mind me asking." he asked both of them.

"Arthur has been in an affair for over a year and he has a son by another woman, the woman happens to be Lady Anne, the woman staying in Camelot with the newborn baby." Gaius stared at Gwen, hardly believing what she was staying, but it made sense that this would distress Merlin enough to send her into a miscarriage.

Gaius made quick work of checking Merlin over and cleaning her up as Gwen changed the bloody sheets to fresh ones. Gaius had made sure that the baby was indeed dead and not injured, Gaius had told her that her stomach would go down, with the child no longer there, and it would go down quicker with exercise.

Gaius had extracted what was left of the baby, a tiny shrivelled thing that Merlin didn't look at, she had already cried enough, she didn't need to do so any more. After everything was done, Merlin went to sleep after Gaius told her it was the best thing to do to lower her stress levels and get over the fact she had, had a miscarriage, although it would takes years to get over it or maybe just years to get used to it, it would remain with her forever.

* * *

Gaius and Gwen were still in the room when Arthur came in.

"Gwen, Gaius, what can I do for you?" he asked, looking between the two of them and Merlin who was sleeping in their bed.

"We were waiting for you." Gaius answered him.

"And why were you waiting for me?"

"We wanted to talk to you about the events of this evening." Gwen said.

"What events?" Arthur asked, taking his crown off his head and walking over to the dresser to place it down.

"Merlin's miscarriage." Gwen stated simply and Arthur dropped his crown and spun around, his face painted with shock as he stared at the two.

"M...Merlin, Merlin had a miscarriage?" Gwen and Gaius nodded. "When?"

"A few hours ago." Gaius said.

"Why did no one tell me?" Arthur said outraged.

"Merlin didn't want you to know, we shouldn't even be telling you now." Gwen replied.

"What are you talking about?" Arthur asked.

"Lady Anne and Edward is what we are talking about sire." Gaius said.

"...What?" Arthur said, his heart pounding against his chest.

"Sire, Merlin found out about the long time affair you have been having with Lady Anne and that Anne became pregnant with your child and she bore you a son, Edward." Gaius explained.

"That upset her the most, Anne did something that Merlin couldn't do for you...she bored you a son and now Merlin has lost the _fourth _child she was going to give you...Merlin may not be able to give you a son, _sire, _but she has given you three wonderful, beautiful and intelligent children, and you should be forever grateful to her, instead you have betrayed her behind her back and caused her miscarriage." Gwen ranted. "I'm sorry, Sire." Gwen apologised afterwards.

Arthur was speechless, he literally had nothing to say, he could not disagree with what Gwen had said because it was all true. Gwen and Gaius took his silence as a cue to leave and Arthur stood stunned in the middle of his chambers, a few minutes later he decided to go to bed and to confront Merlin in the morning about her miscarriage and about Lady Anne and Edward.

* * *

Merlin woke up early, and noticed Arthur sleeping by her side and her eyes widened, she tried to move away from him but her stomach and lower regions ached from his miscarriage last night and that memory brought tears to her eyes which began to spill down her face.

"Merlin?" he husband said. "Why are you crying?" he said, sleep still in his voice and Merlin glared at him before slowly moving off of the bed, holding her stomach in pain, also noticing that it had flattened slightly, it even looked as if it had flattened she noticed as she walked past the mirror by their bed.

"Merlin?" he repeated, looking her up and down also noticing the decrease in her baby bump, obviously because of her miscarriage. "You do know Gwen and Gaius told me...that...that you had a miscarriage last night." Merlin spun around as quickly as she could without causing herself much pain.

"They told you!?" she yelled.

"Yes they did, and they should have told me sooner."

"I didn't want you to know." she sobbed and turned away from Arthur, not wanting him to see her cry more. Arthur got out of the bed and walked over to her, resting his hands on her shoulders to comfort her but she shrugged him off walking over to her wardrobe to dress herself for today.

"Merlin, please talk to me..." he begged.

"And what do you expect me to say!?" Merlin said, wincing slightly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about me having a miscarriage because I found out that you had been fucking another woman behind my back for more than a year and you now have a son by her, a son that I couldn't give you, do our daughters mean nothing to you? Are you not willing to wait for me to give you a son?" she screamed at him, tears just flowing down her face as she stared at her husband who was in shock of her cursing and what she had said.

"Merlin, please just listen to me, let me explain things."

"There is nothing left to explain." Merlin said, picking out a dress from her wardrobe which happened to be in Pendragon red, so she threw it to the floor with a look of disgust before picking out a blue one with the same design.

"Yes there is!"

"Like what?"

"Merlin..."

"You know what?" Merlin shouted, throwing her dress on the bed. "I would have the royal court file a divorce for us right now and I would leave Camelot if it wasn't for our daughters and because of you I now have to tell our children that they are not having another sibling, they are not possibly going to get the brother they have wanted and I have to tell everyone of our friends, and the court, and the people of Camelot, I have to have people look at me with sympathy and I have to suffer this emotional trauma for the rest or my life...and I'm not just talking about my miscarriage!" she shouted, grabbing her dress and going behind the screen to take off her nightdress and put on her blue dress.

"Merlin...please." Merlin can out from the screen, fully dressed, and glared at her husband even more than she already had this morning.

"Arthur, I _hate _you, I am moving out of these chambers to my own, I am never going to have sex with you again, so you may as well keep your relationship going with that slut of a whore Anne but I can tell you one thing, your bastard son will _not _be taking Camelot's throne." Arthur's heart broke at her words, especially the dissolving state of their marriage.

"If that is what you wish, I will see to it that you have chambers ready for tonight." Arthur said, not looking at Merlin. "What will we tell the court and the people?" Arthur asked.

"The people and the court will hear of our miscarriage, otherwise there will be much confusion, although we will tell our daughters first, they are family and they deserve to know first. As for our marriage, everything will stay the same in public eye although there will be no kissing and no touching, only when necessary." Arthur nodded.

"Of course...and...if Edward...the child, will not take the throne of Camelot...who will?" Arthur asked nervously, hoping his question wouldn't upset or anger Merlin any further.

"Charlotte of course, she is the eldest of our children."

"But..."

"She is not male, I know, but she is the oldest child and thus she will take the throne, she is both of our child, Edward is just the result of you being an unfaithful bastard." she said and then walked out of the room leaving Arthur alone and only then did Arthur let the tears fall from his eyes.


	2. 5 Years Later

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **1,184

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

_5 Years Later..._

It had been five years from the incident and Arthur had made sure that Lady Anne and her, as well as his, son Edward were away from the kingdom, he had waited for a few months before making sure they moved out, he didn't want to see them everyday for the rest of his life, they would only remind him of what a horrible mistake he made, one which had ruined his marriage and his life.

It had been five years since he had, had sex, since he had kissed Merlin, hugged Merlin, touched Merlin or slept in the same bed as Merlin. He barely saw her apart from when they were with their children and when they were public or in council.

Merlin had not aged a day, she was now forty years old, but didn't look older than twenty five, Arthur was forty three and looked much older than his age, his hair had already started to grey, although that was most likely from all his stress of the past five years.

His daughters had grown, Charlotte, his eldest was now a teenager, thirteen years old and was starting to turn into a beautiful young woman, although she had always been beautiful, she had long curly dark ebony hair like her mother but the light blue eyes of Arthur. She had taking great interest in politics and even fighting, Arthur even let her join in practice with the knights a couple of times a week and she was very good with a sword, which made Arthur very proud.

Alyssa, the middle child, was now eleven years old and was still as hyper as ever, although did not display it as much in public as she wanted to be a lot like her older sister, a lady. She had kept her hair short, cropped around his shoulders, not as dark as her mother's or sisters but still dark, and her eyes were the same shade as Merlin's. She wasn't interested in much, although loved to spend time with Gaius learning about new things.

His youngest, Isabel was now eight and was the only one of his children to have his hair and she also had his eyes, she spent a lot of time with him, following him around every minute of every day, as much as she could, she was very interested in her daddy and loved wearing his crown and she couldn't wait until she was twenty one and she got her own.

His children were the only real reason he got to see Merlin, around their children they acted like a normal married couple, apart from no kissing and very little or no touching. His children had no idea what was going on with their parents, although he had caught Charlotte looking at them weirdly for the past couple of months.

* * *

One night, during the winter, he felt something crawl into his bed and reacted quickly, sitting up only to find Merlin crawling up his bed and then place herself in his lap.

"Merlin, what?" he asked confused, noticing she was wearing a very thin nightdress, especially for this time of year. She placed a finger at his lips, silencing him.

"Arthur, this does not change anything, It has just been a very long time and unlike you I do not commit adultery." she said as she moved the nightdress exposing her naked body, which Arthur had not seen in five years and was very happy to see it and happy to see it had not changed and his body was reacting to seeing her wonderful naked body. Merlin made her way down his body and removed his clothing before mounting him and riding him until they both reached their peaks a few hours later.

After their wild activities, the two remained as they were, Arthur still inside of Merlin although softening, breathing heavily. Merlin had her head on Arthur's chest, turning to the side, so her face was not in his chest, she closed her eyes and for a second Arthur thought she was going to fall asleep.

"Merlin?"

"Mm?" She said into his chest.

"It's late, and I am sure you don't want to sleep here...you should go back to your own chambers." Arthur said and she moved her face away from his chest and looked up at him briefly.

"Yes..." she said and moved herself off of Arthur and off of the bed picking up her nightdress and putting back on before looking back over at Arthur who had pulled the blankets over the lower half of his body.

"Thank you." she said before walking off out of the room before Arthur had a chance to respond.

* * *

The same find happened the next month and the month after and three more events happened after those two, the two spoke nothing of it, almost as if it had never happened although when Merlin came into his chambers this night, it was not to have sex, but to talk.

"Arthur, our marriage broke down six years ago..." she began, sitting on the edge of the bed, away from Arthur, but looking at him. "And I know recently I have come to your room once a month for...obvious reasons...but after a visit to Gaius I've decided that we need to talk."

"Merlin, what's wrong?"

"I'm pregnant." she stated simply.

"You're, pregnant?" Arthur asked, shocked and happy, but trying not to show the happiness as Merlin didn't seem to happy about it. "But aren't you...?"

"I know I am old Arthur, but I still have my monthly cycle, and will for at least another ten years."

"And...are you happy that we are going to have another child?"

"I didn't think we ever would...after five years of no sex, I thought I could continue going on like that for years, but not wanting to commit adultery so I came to you and then I couldn't stay away, I left a month in between each visit so this wouldn't happen, but it did anyway..."

"Merlin, I am happy that you are pregnant, despite us not...really, being together any more..."

"I am happy that I will have another child, despite the massive age gap between our oldest and our new baby...nearly fifteen years..."

"Yes, but still, another child, I remember when we first got married you said you wanted many children, at least four or five." Merlin was shocked and in awe that Arthur had remembered what she had said a few weeks before their marriage, almost seventeen years ago.

"You remember we saying that?" she said.

"Yes...and I wanted to make that come true but when our marriage broke down, after your...miscarriage...I realised I couldn't, but now I can, and I have...almost." She moved closer to Arthur and hugged him, holding tightly, but not too tight to cause pain.

"Thank you." he hugged her back and the two remained in silence for the rest of the night and Merlin and Arthur even stayed in the same bed that night, sleeping peacefully for the first time in a little over six years.


	3. 7 Months Later

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **893

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

_7 months later..._

Merlin grunted in pain on one side of the door whilst Arthur paced nervously on the other side, although those nerves were calmed when babies cries were heard and the door opened, with Gwen smiling widely.

"Can...can I come in, does she want me to, or?"

"Arthur...yes she wants you to come in and meet your son."

"My s-son?" Arthur said, not believing Gwen's words. "I have a son." Gwen moved out of the way and pointed to the bed Merlin was lying in with a small bundle in her arms which she was cooing to. Her looked to the side of the bed where Gaius was stood, the old man smiled to Arthur and then bowed leaving the room along with Gwen.

Arthur gazed at his wife, even with sweat covering her visible body and her hair sticking to her face, she was still beautiful. Arthur made his way slowly to the bed and sat down next to Merlin, although still not being able to see the child in Merlin's arms. Merlin looked up to him and smiled, she hadn't smiled, well, not properly smiled for a very long time and it made him very happy to see her happy.

"Would you like to hold him?" Merlin asked her husband and Arthur nodded, not being able to speak through his dry throat. Merlin passed the little bundle over to Arthur and the bundle gurgled as this happened.

Arthur looked down at the child in his arms and almost wept in joy at the sight of his first son and the possible perfect thing that could bring him and Merlin back together. The tiny child had very pale skin like his wife and his wide eyes were open and staring up at him, they were the same shade of blue as his wife's and the small scruff of hair on his head was a much lighter shade of blonde than his own.

"He's beautiful..." Arthur gasped at the sight of his son and Merlin beamed at the father and son.

"I was thinking of names...then I thought that, because he is also your son, you might have a name or suggestions of names that you might want to call him."

"I think that you should name him."

"Really?"

"Yes." Merlin thought for a moment, about all of the names she has considered calling her son, and one came to mind, one that she really liked and hoped Arthur would too.

"Aaron, Aaron Pendragon." Merlin said with a proud smile, looking at her son. Arthur passed the little child back to his mother and watched and listened as Merlin song a short lullaby in the old religion which was very affective in putting Aaron to sleep. Once Aaron was asleep Arthur decided it was the best time to speak to Merlin about current events.

"Merlin..."

"Yes?"

"I know I cannot be forgiven, but I was wondering...if you would move back into our old chambers, it was also be far easier with Aaron."

"I'm sensing you want to pick up the rumble that is our marriage and built it back up into the wonderful castle that it was before."

"...Yes." Arthur replied.

"Well I will move back into your chambers, but as for our marriage, I guess we can start to rebuild it...it will take time."

"I know it will."

"You really hurt me Arthur, and I really, _really, _hate you, for causing me so much pain and distress and you made me lose a child!" Merlin said, recalling memories of years ago, she tried to keep her voice low, trying not to wake up Aaron.

"I know I did Merlin, and I know it will take time, a long time, for the cracks in our marriage to be sealed, and don't worry I hate myself also, and I will not start liking myself for a very long time to come." Merlin nodded and smiled down at her son, because of him, Merlin and Arthur were going to fix their marriage and hopefully everything would turn out fine.

There was a small knocking at the door and Isabel, their youngest, well second youngest now, at ten years old came in and stood at the foot of Arthur and Merlin's bed twirling the bottom of her white nightdress through her fingers as she looked up at her parents.

"Issy, what is it?" Her mother asked.

"I heard Gwen and Uncle Gaius talking about you, that you had, had the baby and...I wanted to see my new brother...or sister." she said, quietly and both of her parents smiled.

"You have a brother, his name is Aaron." Arthur said as he patted the bed by him and Isabel jumped up and looked at her little brother, the sibling that now made her an older sister.

"He's so pretty!" she said, staring at his little face. When Arthur and Merlin looked up again they saw thirteen year old Alyssa and fifteen year old Charlotte stood at their door.

"Come on in girls, come and see your brother." Merlin smiled widely and the two ran over to the bed and all three of the girls gazed down in awe at their little brother. Merlin and Arthur looked up at each other and smiled, they would be okay, even though it would take time, they would be okay.


	4. Almost There

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **931

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

_5 Years Later..._

Arthur and Merlin stood by their thrones at the top of the throne room as their oldest daughter Charlotte, now aged twenty one, walked down the middle of the people in the throne, dressed in the best clothing she owned, a red and gold dress with jewels and the Pendragon crest embedded on it.

Charlotte passed her siblings, Alyssa who was now nineteen, Isabel who was now sixteen, Aaron who was now five years old and the youngest and last, as Merlin and Arthur had decided as well as Merlin's biological clock which had began to break down just last year when she turned forty eight and she was now forty nine and her husband fifty one, Henry who was two years old.

Charlotte reached her parents and knelled down in front of her father, looking down at the ground as he father looked down at her, a crown in his hands, a beautiful crown, especially made for his eldest daughter.

"Charlotte Hunith Pendragon, do you solemnly to govern the people of this kingdom and its dominions according to the statues, customs and laws laid down by my forebears as if they were your own?" Arthur began.

"I do." Charlotte replied to her father.

"And you shall not change them unless seeking council from your father, myself, the King or your mother The Queen?" Arthur continued.

"Yes, your majesty."

"Will you to your power cause Law and Justice, in Mercy, to be executed in all your judgments?"

"I will." she said.

"And do you swear your allegiance to the kingdom of Camelot, now and for as long as you shall live."

"I, Charlotte Hunith Pendragon, do pledge life and limb to your service and to the protection of the kingdom and its peoples."

"Then by the power vested in me, I crown you Charlotte Hunith Pendragon, Princess of Camelot!" Arthur said, smiling proudly at his daughter as he placed the crown upon her head and helped her up from the ground and spinning her around to face the people of the council for the first time as crowned princess of Camelot.

"Long Live Princess Charlotte!" Merlin shouted and it sounded out as the people around them continued it and Merlin and Arthur beamed proudly at their eldest child.

* * *

Later on that evening after celebrating Princess Charlotte's coming of age and being crowned, crowned princess Charlotte of Camelot, Merlin and Arthur went back to their chambers.

"Charlotte looked so beautiful today, I know she will no longer be Queen of Camelot but she will make a wonderful princess and member of the court and someday she will make a brilliant wife and mother." Merlin said while undressing herself and putting her nightdress on.

"If we both die, before Aaron is of age then she will have to step in as temporary Queen and crown him and make him king when he turns twenty one." Arthur said, also dressing into his night clothes.

"What makes you think that we will die before Aaron turns twenty one? We will both be in our sixties and with our vast amounts of food and excellent health care we will live far into our eighties maybe even nineties if we are lucky."

"I guess so, it would be nice to watch our children grow up and have children of their own."

"I'm sure we will be grandparents soon enough." Merlin smiled and Arthur looked at her, knowing she knew something.

"What is it, Merlin?"

"Charlotte has been in a relationship with a young knight in training for the last year or so, innocent relationship, believe me, I have made sure of it and they really do love each other." Merlin said, very happy.

"Then...why has she not told me?" Merlin sighed and walked over to her husband.

"Well for one thing she thinks you want her to go into an arranged marriage if it pleases you, she wants to make you happy."

"I am not going to put any of our children into an arranged marriage, Merlin, and what would make me happy is seeing them happy, if they wanted to get married then they can and I will be happy, if they don't want to, then I will be fine with that." Arthur said.

"I'm glad to hear that Arthur but there is one other thing that is stopping Charlotte from getting married."

"And what is that?" Arthur asked.

"She doesn't want what happened to us to happen to her."

"What do you..." Arthur began to say before what Merlin was referring to hit him. "Oh..." Merlin looked up at him sadly and Arthur sighed.

"Merlin, it won't happen to her, the knight she is in love with can't be as terrible a man as I am." Arthur said and Merlin had to both agree and disagree with him. Arthur was a loving man and a brilliant father, but what he had done in the past was a terrible thing and remained with her to this day, although Arthur had been fantastic since they had got back together and was doing everything he could to fix what he had done.

"Arthur, what you did was a horrible thing but I know you are trying to fix things and you have done so well, I love you, I really do, despite our past, although I will never forget it."

"I don't expect you to I was, am, a bastard." Arthur said and Merlin cupped his face and dragged him down for a kiss.

"I love you."

"And I love you too."


	5. Charlotte

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **644

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

Princess Charlotte was pulling the several pins from her hair that had been put their in place for her crowning ceremony. It was a wonderful day and a wonderful night and she hadn't seen her parents this happy since...since, before they had split...even though they were back together now they were still not as happy as they previously were.

There was a knock at the doors to her chambers and she froze wondering who could be knocking at this late hour.

"...Hello?" she called out.

"Charlotte?" she relaxed when she recongised her father's voice.

"Hey dad, come in." she called out and Arthur opened the door and stepped in before closing it behind her. "Hey dad." she smiled brightly. "What can I do for you."

"I just wanted to talk." he said, walking closer towards his daughter.

"Uh oh, about what? What have I done now? And you know I didn't break that vase, it's just because I am the eldest I get in trouble for it." she said, throwing her arms up in the air before dipping her hands in a bowl of warm water and using it to wash away the powder from her face.

"It's not about the vase, which, by the way, I do know was Isabel and she will be punished for it."

"Good and if you didn't come here about that, what did you come here to talk about?" she said, picking up a small hand towel to wipe her face dry.

"I came here to talk about something your mother told me." Charlotte stopped drying her face and turned around fully so that her body faced her father's.

"What did she tell you?" Charlotte asked nervously.

"About you...lover, but not lover." he said, uncertain of how to refer to the man, as he did not know his name.

"Do...do you mean Jonathon?" she asked, her voice shaking.

"I don't know." he said. "Your mother didn't give me the name of the man." he said and received no reply. His daughter was just looking down at her pale joined hands in her lap. "Charlotte?" he said, trying to get her attention.

"Will you send him away?" a small voice said.

"What?" Arthur asked, unsure of what his daughter had just said.

"Jonathon, will you banish him?" Charlotte said looking up with tears in her eyes. "Send him away? Banish me? Please, father, don't." she said, a few tears spilling out of her eyes and Arthur started to panic, not wanting his daughter to turn into an emotional wreck and think he was going to ruin her happiness by sending the person she loves away.

"Hey, Charlie, it's okay." he said, gathering his eldest child up in her arms.

"I'm sorry father, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I know you want me to get married to some prince or lord, but I love Jonathon." she sobbed into her father's chest.

"I know sweetheart and that is why I have come to talk to you." he said, pulling his daughters shoulders back so he could look at her face, which was red and wet from her crying.

"W-What?" she stuttered.

"I don't want you to marry some prince or lord, I just want you to be happy and if Jonathon makes you happy, then that is who I want you to marry." Charlotte's face broke out into a wide smile as she hugged her father tight.

"Oh, daddy, thank you so much." Arthur smiled and hugged his daughter tightly back.

* * *

_6 Months Later..._

* * *

Charlotte and Jonathon stood at the top of the court room, just by the thrones and their hands were joined together and Geoffrey joined them together forever.

As the princess looked out towards the crowd, she saw her father, smiling with happy tears in her eyes. She really was grateful to have a father like him.


	6. Alyssa

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **1,077

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

**2 years later...**

* * *

The last two years had been brilliant, not only had Arthur and Merlin gotten closer, their horrible past almost behind close doors, but their eldest daughter Charlotte had just told them that she was expecting her and Jonathon's first child together, which would make them grandparents.

It was slightly weird that they would become grandparents when their youngest was only four years old, and that a four year old was going to be an uncle but they all were very excited.

Their second youngest, Alyssa, had turned twenty one a few months ago and a few days later had been crowned, Princess Alyssa of Camelot. Everyone was very happy for her, and were also hoping that she would soon find someone to love and marry and then start her own family, only she had shown no signs of anyone taking her fancy and Merlin decided to talk to her daughter, to see if she could be expecting even more grandchildren any time soon.

* * *

"Come in." Alyssa's voice rang out and Merlin entered her second oldest child's room. "Hi Mum." Alyssa smiled brightly as she saw her mother walk through her chambers doors.

"Hey sweetie, how are you doing?" Merlin asked as she sat down beside her daughter on the bed.

"I'm fine, mum, how are you?"

"I'm also fine, thank you." Merlin replied as her daughter picked up her brush and hand mirror and began to work through the knots in her shoulder length brown hair that had developed during the day.

"I don't mean to sound rude mum, but what's up with the sudden visit?"

"I just wanted to talk to you sweetie." Alyssa stopped brushing her hair and turned to her mother.

"About what?"

"Well..." Merlin started. "Shortly after Charlotte was crowned Princess of Camelot she announced her relationship with Jonathon and they married and now she is pregnant, starting a family of her own." Alyssa nodded.

"Yes, but, what does this have to do to me?" she asked and returned to brushing her hair.

"Don't you want to get married and start a family of your own?" Merlin asked and Alyssa stopped brushing her hair again, her eyes casting downwards and Merlin grew worried. "Allie what's wrong?" she asked her daughter, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I...I can't get married or have a family of my own." Alyssa said in a quiet voice, her explanation only confusing Merlin more.

"What do you mean sweetie?"

"I...I..." Alyssa's face grew red and she flinched when her mother cupped one of her cheeks in her hand, her face was forced around by her mother's hand, and she placed the other hand on the other cheek.

"Sweetheart, what is it."

"I...I don't find men attractive, in any way." she muttered, refusing to look at her mother.

"Do you find women attractive?" Merlin asked and she knew the answer when Alyssa's face turned a darker red.

"Y...yes." Alyssa said and dropped her head into her hands and by the sniffling sounds coming from her daughter, Merlin could tell she was crying, she also heard her daughter say something but couldn't quite hear here through her hands or tears.

"What did you say sweetie?" Merlin asked, pulling her daughter's hands away from her face, showing the previously pale face to now be pink in colour and red around the eyes as well as the cheeks being tear stained.

"I-I said I s-sorry about being such a f-freak, I'm sorry I'm not normal and I'm s-sorry I've disappointed you and daddy." she said before covering her face in her hands again.

"Sweetheart." Merlin said, pulling her hands away from her face again. "Myself and your father have never been disappointed in you or any of your siblings, and you are not a freak, liking someone of the same gender does not make you any different to anyone else in this kingdom or the entire world, and don't let anyone tell you any different and if they do then they will have me and your father to answer to, okay?" Merlin told her daughter sternly.

"Really?" was all Alyssa could say, nearly speechless from how understanding her mother had been.

"Of course."

"Oh, Mummy thank you so much, I love you." Alyssa said as she wrapped her arms around her mother and squeezed her in a tight hug.

"I love you too sweetie, now tell me, have you got your eye on some fair maiden in the kingdom." Alyssa blushed as she pulled away from the hug.

"Well...there is this one girl..."

"Oh, tell me more."

* * *

King Arthur didn't visit the farmlands very often but this was a special occasion. Every farmer was very shocked to see him in their area, but welcomed him in and offered him food and drink, but he declined, he had only come here to see someone.

"Excuse me." the King asked a middle aged farmer. "I was wondering if you knew where I could find Allison?"

"Well that would be my daughter, My King, would you...would you like to see her?"

"If you don't mind." The King said and was led into the man's house.

"Allison, there is someone here to see you." the man called out and a very pretty, petite young woman with auburn hair and stunning green eyes came out from another part of the house and froze as she saw the King.

"S-Sire...what can I do for you."

"Well, I just wanted to meet the young woman who had captured my daughter's heart." the woman blushed, darker than her hair and looked down.

"I'm sorry sire, I didn't mean to...I..."

"There is no need to apologise, I was just going to give you my blessing, I hope the two of you plan on making your...partnership...honourable before consummating it." Allison blushed deeper.

"I do, sire."

* * *

It only took a week before Allison and Alyssa were engaged and a month later they married, making them the first same sex couple in the whole of the kingdom, but they were not last, many more followed, no longer afraid of what everyone would think of them, thanks to the princess.

After two years marriage Allison and Alyssa decided they wanted children and were planning to adopt when Merlin came up with a great idea, something she'd seen in a spell book. Allison was pregnant the next month with her and Alyssa's biological child.

* * *

**A.N/ Wrote this today after I got a lot of homophobic abuse from someone yesterday, mainly due to the fact me and my girlfriend broke up about 2 months ago, it's pathetic and there is nothing wrong with Gays, Lesbians etc. LGBT! FTW! **

**NO HATE PLEASE, I MYSELF AM BISEXUAL SO WILL TAKE IT TO HEART. **


	7. Aaron

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **1,079

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

**6 years later...**

* * *

Aaron had just reached his teenage a few weeks ago and a few days ago he had started to panic. Whenever he spoke it came out weird and much different than before, at first he had passed it off as a sore throat but after four days, he could no longer do so. One time his voice would be it's normal pitch, one time it is higher and one time it is lower.

He was starting to worry, but was to embarrassed to go to the court physician about it so he had just kept his worrying to himself, although whenever he was forced to talk to someone, everyone would notice how awkward he would act but no one would comment on his voice, was he just imagining it?

* * *

"Aaron, can you look after May for me for this afternoon?" his sister Alyssa asked and Aaron rolled his eyes, yes of course he'd love to look after his four year old niece for the afternoon instead of doing something fun and worth while.

"Of course Alyssa, anything for such a brilliant sister." he smiled mockingly at her and she glared at him as she brought her young daughter into the room.

"No need to be rude, you don't have to do it, it's just..."

"You and your wife want to spend some quality time together, some time without May with you." he said his voice squeaking at the end, and looked away from his sister hoping that she didn't hear the pitch change.

"Yes, so please, I'll even pay you." she bribed her brother who suddenly became interested.

"How much?" he said, quickly making sure his voice didn't have time to change pitch.

"20 gold coins." He arched an eyebrow and his sister sighed.

"30?" no reaction. "40 and that is my final offer." she said, moving her child to her hip.

"Fine." he said and walked over to his sister at his chambers door to take the child off of her and rest her at his hip instead. "When will you." he stopped, coughing for a bit when his voice changed, again. "pick him up?" he continued.

"Just before the evening meal." she said before leaving.

"You're welcome?" he said to the closed door and then looked at his niece who was staring up at him. "You better not be a pain." he said and the little girl grinned.

* * *

Just like Alyssa had said, she had come to collect May just before the evening meal so that Aaron could dress formally for the evening meal with the rest of his family. It only took him a few minutes to dress as he had already prepared his clothes and ten minutes later he was in the dining hall and took his place at the table with the rest of his family. Small chit chat was exchanged during the family meal, not much else was said until his father, King Arthur, directed a question at him.

"Aaron." he began and attracted his oldest son's attention.

"Yes, father?" he answered.

"Many of us are worried about you at the moment, well, we have been for almost a week." he said and Aaron became very nervous.

"Worried about what, father?" he asked.

"You've been acting weird these last few weeks, something to do with your voice, maybe? Are you ill? He asked and Aaron flushed.

"No father, I'm not ill." he clarified and began picking at his food in an attempt not to look at his family.

"Then what's wrong?" his mother asked him concerned.

"Nothing." he said, leaning back in his chair.

"Aaron, it is obviously something."

"No it isn't father, now if you don't mind I am going retire to my chambers as I have finished, good evening and good night." Aaron said as he stood up and then retreating from the dining hall to his chambers to be away from anyone and sulk. Once he was gone, Merlin turned to her husband.

"Arthur, you have to go and talk to him, something is up and I am not going to watch my son suffer in silence."

"If you don't want your son to suffer in silence, then why don't you go and talk to him?" Arthur suggested and Merlin kicked him under the table and their youngest child and son laughed at them.

"Because he is a male, I am a female, you are also a male, so you will speak to him." Merlin spoke out more simply for him.

"Fine." Arthur said rolling his eyes and draining the rest of his glass before leaving the dining room and heading to his son's chambers.

* * *

Arthur didn't bother to knock like he did when he visited his daughters, he just walked in and spotted his son lying face down on his bed.

"Aaron, know that it is just the two of us do you want to talk?" he asked and took a seat at the end of his bed.

"No."

"I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong." Aaron sighed and changed position so that he was sitting against his pillows facing his father.

"Something is wrong with my voice." he admitted, not looking at his father.

"What do you mean?"

"Sometimes I speak normally, sometimes it is higher than normal and sometimes it is lower. It's been happening for weeks, it won't go away, I don't know what's happening and I don't know what to do." Aaron admitted to his father. Suddenly the sound of laughter hit his ears and he looked up to see his father bent over in laughter. "What are you laughing at?" he half yelled at his father.

"Nothing, nothing." Arthur said, as his laughter calmed down.

"I could be dying you know and you're laughing."

"Oh, Aaron, you aren't dying." Arthur said rolling his eyes.

"And how would you know?"

"Because I went through the same thing when I was your age." Aaron was about to ask his father how he could have gone through the same thing but Arthur spoke again before he could. "You're going through puberty, your voice is changing it should stop soon and your voice will be deeper and will remain that way."

"So...everything is okay? This is normal?" he asked his father.

"Yes, Aaron, you are going to be fine." he reassured.

"Thanks, dad." he smiled and his father smiled back at him.

"No problem, son."


	8. Heir to the Throne

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **871

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

**5 Years On...**

* * *

Arthur and Merlin were getting on in age and needed to make plans in case anything happened to them. The first topic on their minds was who was going to take the throne once both Merlin and Arthur had passed away.

They first talked about their son taking the throne, as in tradition, but they themselves were not very tradition, so decided to asked their eldest, Charlotte, what she thought on the matter.

"No thanks." she smiled, lifting her third and youngest child, Olivia, to her hip and walking to the other side of her chambers.

"Why not?" Merlin asked her eldest daughter.

"I wouldn't be a very young Queen and I'm thrusting the throne onto my children as well, I don't want them to rule over a kingdom." Charlotte said and Merlin nodded.

"Of course, I understand, well I guess I'll have to asked Alyssa next, although she might give me the same answer that you gave me." Merlin sighed.

"She might, she might not or she might just want some time to think about it." her daughter said and she nodded.

"Well, I have three other children I can ask if she says no, I just want some safety for the kingdom as I don't know how much longer I have, or your father for that matter."

"Mother, you're hardly old, you've got another twenty years at least. How about you leave the throne to one of your grandchildren, then you can guarantee that they will rule over Camelot for a very long time."

"What do you mean?"

"By the time you and father past away, we'll all be in our fifties, forties and thirties, whereas our children will all be coming of age."

"That does sound like a good idea, but a lot of responsibility for someone so young." Merlin said.

"Father was king at a young age though wasn't he?"

"Late twenties, so, I guess so." Merlin said.

"Well you've got an answer there, but I still think that you should talk with Alyssa about it, you never know she might want to take the throne and become the Queen of Camelot."

"I will talk to her, thank you Charlotte."

"You're welcome mother."

* * *

"What?" Alyssa exclaimed, a shocked expression covering her face.

"I was wondering if you had any thoughts on taking the throne of Camelot?" she repeated her early question.

"Why? Are you ill?" she asked panicked.

"No, no, I'm fine."

"Is father ill?" she asked, still panicked.

"No, no! Nobody is ill!"

"Oh, good, so, why are you asking me this?"

"We just want to make sure we have a chosen heir for when we pass on, Charlotte doesn't want to take the throne, so I'm asking you, as my second oldest."

"I don't know mother..."

"You don't have to say yes if you don't want to sweetheart."

"Just give me some time to think about it...please?"

"Of course, take as long as you want and then come and find me when you've made your decision."

* * *

Only an hour later did Alyssa summon her sisters Charlotte and Isabel to her chambers and when hey entered they were both very worried.

"Alyssa, are you okay?" Charlotte said as she walked in, concerned for her younger sister.

"Yes I'm fine I just wanted to talk to you two about something." she said.

"And what would that be?" Asked Isabel.

"Well mother and father are picking which one of us is going to take the throne after they pass, and I know that Charlotte has turned it down and I don't know if I should or not...Isabel...if I turned it down, would you take it up or turn out down as well?"

"To be honest with you, I would turn it down, I think that the person that should take the throne from mother and father should be Aaron." Isabel spoke. "He'd be in his thirties, one of the youngest and at that age he has much to teach and much to learn, he'd be a great king and he is already a great warrior, we hardly know anything about war and fighting, we're good at magic, whereas Aaron is good at both."

"I think we have an answer then." Charlotte said. "We best tell mother."

"Guards!" Princess Alyssa shouted out.

"Yes, princess?"

"Would you please fetch my mother for me, me and my sisters wish to talk to her."

"Of course ma'am."

"Thank you." she said.

* * *

Not more than a few minutes after they had sent the guard to fetch their mother, he was back with her.

"Alyssa, you ask to see me- oh, hello Charlotte, Isabel." their mother said catching sight of her three daughters.

"Mother we wanted to talk to you about who's taking the throne when you and father pass." Isabel said.

"Yes, and?" Merlin prompted.

"We think it would be best if Aaron took the throne." Merlin nodded.

"If that is what you want, thank you girls."

The three daughters smiled at their mother, happy that she was so and that they wouldn't have to be Queen. They knew they wouldn't be as good rulers as their little brother would be.


	9. I Forgive You

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **641

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

10 years later...

* * *

For the past ten years Aaron had been prepared by his father for his role as the heir of the throne and how to be a King and he was just as ready as he would ever be, which made both his parents and his siblings very proud.

During the time that Aaron had been training to be a King, he'd gotten married at twenty two to Lady Melissa of Camelot, a daughter of one of King Arthur's knights. And they'd become parents to a young son last year, making Merlin and Arthur grandparents for the eighth time.

Only a week ago had Merlin and Arthur's youngest son and child, Henry, had been crowned Prince of Camelot. Now all of their children were official princes and princesses of Camelot.

* * *

Arthur was alone in the throne room, stood by a window watching his daughters and grandchildren play on fields and his sons train with the knights, Arthur only practised with them once a week, due to his old age and a requirement form his physician.

"Arthur?" Merlin asked and he turned around to see Merlin walking towards him, wearing a form fitting dark blue dress, despite being in her late sixties, she was still in very good shape and looked decades younger than she actually was, the same couldn't be said for Arthur.

"Hello Merlin." he smiled before turning back to look out of window.

"What are you doing." Merlin said as she stepped up beside her husband.

"Watching." he said and she looked out the window to see what her husband was watching.

"Maybe you ought to rest, you've been up over twelve hours and you know what the physician said.

"I know." Arthur sighed.

"Let's get you to bed." Merlin said, putting her hands on his shoulders and turning him away from the window and walking him out of the throne room.

* * *

"I knew I'd hate getting old, but this is ridiculous." Arthur groaned as Merlin dressed him into his night clothes. "It's still light out and will be for hours, but I have to sleep...for my health."

"You know complaining won't make you healthier or younger." Merlin said as she finished dressing him.

"How do you stay so young, you're only two years younger than me."

"I have magic, it keeps me looking and feeling young, I'll die at the age I am naturally meant to, just looking and feeling younger."

"You're lucky." Arthur said, climbing into their bed and Merlin knelt down on the floor on Arthur's side of the bed.

"I guess so." she smiled, resting her arms on the bed and her chin on her arms. "Arthur, I wanted to talk to you."

"What about?"

"About...when you cheated on me." Arthur's eyes widened, that wasn't a subject they talked about often, it had been five years since they'd last mentioned it.

"What about it?" Arthur asked, not sure what else to say.

"We should talk about it more, it isn't something that is just going to go away without being talked about."

"Talking about it doesn't make it any better." Arthur said sadly. "You know I regret what happened Merlin, those years we were apart, were the worst years of my life."

"I just..."

"What?"

"I forgive you." that took Arthur by surprise, he had not been expected to be forgiven, never in his life.

"You what?" he asked, not sure if what he had heard was right or not.

"I forgive you Arthur." she repeated and Arthur felt himself tear up and decided to hide them by bringing Merlin's face close to his so he could kiss her.

"Thank you." he mummered when they broke away, kissing her cheek, her forehead and then the top of her very slowly greying hair. "I love you."

"I love you too Arthur."


	10. Avalon

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **702

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC

* * *

Merlin and Arthur were very old now, many of their friends had already passed away and they knew it wasn't long before they would be joining then, it didn't bother them that they were going to die...the only thing that did was whether or not they were going to die at the same time.

Merlin, nor Arthur, wanted to die before the other and spend days, weeks, months or even years without their other half, it would be a living hell. But there was no way they could confirm that they would die at the same time...was there?

Arthur was on his death bed and Merlin was in full health...this is just what they feared. Merlin was going to live longer than Arthur, she was going to have to live some time without him.

* * *

"_Merlin, if I die, don't do anything stupid, please." _

That hurt to hear, that her husband would accuse her of doing something so drastic if he was to pass, although Merlin would be lying if she was to say she hadn't thought about it. Suicide. Using her magic to kill herself quickly and painlessly or to find something similar.

"_I would never."_

She would. They both knew. It would be very hard on Merlin to live alone, without her husband, it would be for anyone.

"_Liar."_

Arthur knew her far too well.

"_Arthur-"_

"_Merlin, think of our children and our grandchildren, the rest of our family and friends, how it will affect them."_

"_Our children know that we are _both _nearing the end Arthur, we've watched them grow up, get married, become parents...they've had their lives with us, it's time you and I both go to Avalon."_

"_Merlin, you have so much more to do...you can easily live another five or ten years."_

"_Not without you."_

"_I love you Merlin."_

"_I love you too Arthur."_

When she'd returned to their room later on that night, she had found that Arthur had passed away. She sobbed and screamed her agony and pain at his bedside before announcing to the rest of her family that Arthur had passed and then they made it official to the kingdom that their king had passed and Merlin was ruling the kingdom alone.

Her children and even her grandchildren could tell she was not dealing with Arthur's death at all, but who could just deal with their other half's parting? They always kept a watch on her, watching to see if she was going to do something, just like Arthur had requested that they do.

* * *

"Mother?" her oldest daughter said as she stepped into what used to be her parents room and now belonged only to Merlin.

"Yes, Charlotte." Merlin said from her place on the empty bed, not looking up at her daughter.

"You didn't come to dinner, are you okay?"

"I don't know why you keep asking me Charlotte, you know I'm not."

"Mother..."

"Don't, you don't know what it's like." Merlin sobbed, but no tears fell as all her emotions caught in her throat as she tried to keep them in control.

"You weren't the only one who lost him, mother, he was my father, he had children and grandchildren who all miss him dearly, but we know that death is a part of life that we can not avoid."

"I just want to be with him again." Merlin said looking at her daughter with wet eyes.

"And you will."

"I want to now." Merlin said, never taking her eye's off of Charlotte.

"Mother, please don't start this again."

"Charley, I'm begging you, we can make this look like a natural passing, I just need your help." Melrin caught her daughter's darker hands in her ivory ones and squeezed them and Charlotte looked up into her mothers pained and miserable eyes.

"Okay."

* * *

The next morning Charlotte had announced that her mother had passed away in her sleep, almost a week after her father had done the same. But what really happened Charlotte would take to the grave, she wanted her mother to be happy and she always was when she was with Arthur.

* * *

"_Merlin?"_

"_It's so good to see you again Arthur." Merlin sobbed and pulled her husband into an embrace. _


	11. Finale

**Title: **It Is All Your Fault

**Author: **RomaMarufixx

**Rating: **M

**Pairing: **Fem!Merlin/Arthur

**Summary:** Merlin and Arthur have been married for 10 years and have three children together, Charlotte, 8, Alyssa, 6 and Isabel, 3. When Merlin suffers a miscarriage with her fourth child she is sent on a deep emotional turmoil, and it is later found out there is more to the miscarriage than everyone thinks. Fem!Merlin, Arthur/Fem!Merlin.

**Word count: **1,179

**Disclaimer: **Merlin belongs to the BBC.

* * *

The Finale / Epilogue

* * *

When Merlin had died Aaron had been to take the throne but he couldn't, his parents death had destroyed him, he was an emotional wreck and denied the throne, depsite the years spent training for the part. He wanted to leave Camelot to return to his wife's homeland with their children but had promised his siblings he would stay in Camelot to choose the next King or Queen and witness their crowning before he left.

Charlotte did not want to be the Queen, her excuse was that she was far too old, although at her age she didn't look a day past 35, she could thank her magic and her mother for that. Even when told by her younger siblings that should would at least have a 20 year reign, maybe even 30 because of her magic but she still decline saying it wouldn't be fair to stick her eldest son on the throne when he would be even older than she is now. Her siblings also knew that she had taken her parents death the worst, having fallen into depression, only mild though, and she didn't want to ruin Camelot with her sullen behaviour.

Alyssa also declined, stating she was also too old as well as the fact she didn't want to confuse the kingdom with their being two Queen's and people could understand that, while Camelot was very accepting and she was not ashamed of her sexuality, her wife and her children she thought it would be best if the throne missed her.

Isabel had always been afraid of speaking in public, even in discussions she kept quiet, rarely voicing her opinions unless something urked her, she was more of a talk to me and I'll talk to you back person and she had told her siblings she could not be Queen because of that and they understand, a Queen could hardly be a Queen if she could not talk to her people, so Isabel was crossed off the list and missed the throne.

In the end the youngest son of the late King Arthur and Queen Merlin was chosen to become the next King and the crowing of King Henry of Camelot was son to begin.

"I'm going to trip, fall and die, aren't I?" Henry said staring at his reflection as Isabel finished putting on his cloak that had once belonged to their father and now belonged to him.

"No...maybe." Isabel said, remembering how clumsy their mother used to be, and they knew they all had a bit of the sorceress in them, and Henry was most like her in that manner, espically when he was nervous. "Just don't be nervous, there's really nothing to be nervous about, it's just like your crowning as prince of Camelot, that wasn't bad now, was it?"

"No..."

"Excatly, now come on...my king." Isabel mocked bowed and was rewarded with a slap by her brother.

* * *

It was so odd to have breathed your last breath in the world of the living and now breathe the next in Avalon. But it was refreshing, everything looked and felt so much better.

From where Merlin was standing she could see a lake, very similar to the one she had cast Freya into after her death. Maybe now she was in Avalon she would see her old friend again. She walked up to the lake and peered in it, gasping at her reflection.

She looked so young, younger than when she had her last child, younger than when she had her first child, younger than when she and Arthur got married in fact she looked the exact same as when she first came to Camelot decades ago when she was just eighteen years old.

"Merlin." a familiar voice said from behind her and she froze, emotions clogged in her throat and her eyes teared up as she turned around to face the person who the voice belonged to.

"It's so good to see you again Arthur." Merlin sobbed and pulled her husband into an embrace which he returned.

"It's been a week Merlin."

"Still too long." she sobbed.

"Merlin..." he said and pulled her back. "I thought I told you not to-"

"I don't care Arthur, I couldn't live without you."

"Our children-"

"Are fine and brave, sure they will be upset with our passing but they are strong and will get past it, now, we have to go somewhere."

"Go where?"

"Just follow me." she grinned and pulled Arthur after her.

* * *

The most important people in Camelot where present in the throne room, the council, the knights, the royal family, other people of royalty and various people from the towns.

As soon as Henry and Isabel entered the room it was silent and all eyes were on him, which didn't help make him feel any less nervous. Isabel quickly drifted into the crowd of people and to where the rest of her family were.

"Prince Henry, if you would kneel." Geoffery's grandson, Jeremy said to him and he knelt down. The ceremony lasted a little over an hour, it was very similar to his crowning as prince but a lot longer and a lot more to promise and commit to.

"I now crown you, King Henry of Camelot." Jeremy said with a smile and placed the crown down on Henry's head and he stood up and faced his court and family for the first time as their ruler, their King.

"Long Live The King!" Jeremy shouted out to the court and they echoed it, clapping as they did so.

Henry looked around the hall, catching the eye of his only brother Aaron who was grinning. He couldn't help but feel that his brother didn't want to take the throne at first which is why he had passed it on for someone else and so that he could take his wife away from Camelot, the poor woman got very homesick a lot of the time.

He looked on at his sisters who were smiling just as much and he could of sworn he saw a few tears in their eyes. He looked around at the rest of the hall and just as he looked at the back his heart almost dropped of fright.

There in the back of the hall, surrounded by a dull light were his parents, like he'd never seen them before, they looked young, he could only guess that this was how they looked when they were just married.

They were both smiling and clapping along with the rest of the crowd and it was just then that Henry realised he was the only one in the hall that could see the old King and Queen. He smiled when he noticed what they were mouthing at him.

"_We are so proud of you."_

"_We love you."_

They waved and they were gone. Fresh tears spilled down the King's face, he would make sure that he was a good king for his parents, his siblings, his friends and his people.

The End.


End file.
